Learning, learning, learning

Something I am very proud of and hold with high esteem is my passion for personal growth. I don't want to be faster, bigger, stronger, or richer. I want to be wiser. Or is it "more wise"? Hm.

I was struck by one of those random revelations today while browsing Craig's List. Yes, I am an obsessive "Farm and Garden" browser and yes, it has gotten me in to trouble before. However, I have no regrets and love the individual animals whether I rescued them from a horrible situation or, in a moment of weakness, just told myself I was rescuing the animal when really I just wanted the animal. And there is nothing wrong with wanting the company of a new animal friend... but you have to seriously plan to make things work well. Otherwise you set yourself up for frustration. I am all too familiar with this feeling of frustration!

So, what was the revelation? Well, there was this goat. The ad read "Oreo Goat, Sweet Playful!". I clicked. Read. Want.
A sweet, playful goat. 100lbs. Been with horses, cows, and others. Just wants to be loved, etc, etc, etc. My mind started planning. Maybe this goat would play with Max and Max wouldn't cry so much for attention and maybe the goat would bond with Darsy, too, and...

Then I stopped myself. Really, Kathy? You really want another mouth that cries "Mooooom" every single day? Now don't get me wrong, if my ideal situation did work, life would be easier. But what are the chances of an individual creature perfectly matching the personalities of the bovids and falling into our routine without a hitch?
Um, nil.

The revelation was, simply, to think. Be thorough. And don't forget to think about the worst case scenario, because that often happens. Keep in mind that these breathing, heart-pumping beings have a past, have habits, have quirks, have wants and needs, and have a way to express them vocally and potentially incessantly. Max, for example, was supposed to bond with Darsy so that she would stop mooing (non-stop). And so what did Max do? Max moos all-the-time. Why? Because he loves me and wants me to be with him. So does Darsy. That hasn't changed. Is there a solution? Yes, but I don't think getting them a goat friend is the best solution. Or even a good one.

You can't tell an animal "I'm going to save you and bring you home and you're going to be happy!" That animal may have a completely different plan in mind. Or he may be so traumatized that he's going to be introverted for months. Or maybe she's been so abused that she wants nothing more than to kill you and every other fur-less two-legged predator. Or maybe he just wants his old herd back. Is that so wrong?

Animals can do no wrong. They are innocent. They have no concept of "right and wrong". So keep in mind, self, that when an animal reacts however it reacts, it is my human requirement to be a good Shepard despite how their behavior makes me feel. So when deciding whether or not to take on more responsibility, think about that animal and what emotional experience they might go through... and if you are ready to handle it responsibly, patiently, compassionately, wisely.